13/07/2011

You Big Baby

A woman in Texas has given birth to a record-breaking baby who weighed in at more than 16lbs.

That's more that twice what the new Beckham baby weighed. That's like pushing out two Haper Sevens. So, a Harper Fourteen.

The baby boy, called JaMichael, was born to Janet Johnson and Michael Brown in hospital in Longview, Texas .

Ms Johnson said: "A lot of the baby clothes we bought for him will have to be returned. They're already too small for him to wear."

Heck, just stitch together the remnants of your clothes and his dad's clothes, cos that's what you've clearly done with his name. Janet and Michael calling their kid JaMichael. The poor kid is one Jeremy Kyle DNA test away from having to change his name.

I don't like this mash-up thing with names, even though being called Steve it sounds like I have rather religious parents. It's like a saint and Eve got it on.

The hospital also had trouble kitting out such a large baby. He is the heaviest ever born there, and its nursery for newborns does not have nappies big enough to fit him.

I bet he had to use adult nappies. Oh well, it'll be good practice for when he's older and uses one for his World of Warcraft marathons.

>Read the source story
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