30/11/2012

Hmm, Bacon Shaving Cream

Men. Are you tired of shaving with normal shaving foam and smelling clean and fresh after? Then look no further.

A company has started making bacon scented shaving foam. Finally! Now I have something I can use to get rid of those strange hairs you get on pork crackling.

J&D's Foods has made what they call a 'high end, luxurious bacon-scented shaving cream'. The US business added that you should use it after a hot wash or prior to a date with your potential soul mate.

Good point. For years Lynx has boasted of the 'Lynx effect' where the smell of your bodyspray attracts women who run to you and want to have lots of sex. In a double-blind scientific test, it didn't work. I got slapped in the face.

But if you smell of bacon, you will attract women. Large, hungry women, but still, they're women. And if you attract hungry women by smelling of bacon you feel OK. If you attract hungry women when you smell of Lynx Africa, you get such first world guilt.

Justin Esch, the 'inventor' of the strange shaving product, said: "There is nothing more powerful than the smell of bacon, nothing. Bacon is the smell of champions."

Is it? I did not know that. I can only imagine that Stratford in London must've stunk of bacon all summer. Any vegetarians getting off the Jubilee line must've been filled with regret.

The bacon flavoured shaving cream is available for around £9. Although there's a recession on, so some Poundland shaving gel, a bag of Frazzles and some imagination, you can get the same effect.

>Read the source story
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