09/11/2012

Woman Who Enjoyed Starbucks Too Much

A woman was arrested after she was spotted masturbating in a Starbucks.

Now, I like coffee. I go to coffee shops all the time, but you'd never catch me masturbating in Starbucks. Because I know how to hide it well.

Police were summoned "by the staff at Starbucks regarding a female that was in their lobby and was masturbating."

They called the police? That's passing up on some great PR. They should've filmed it, put it on YouTube and put a caption on saying, "Our coffee is so good, look what it makes people do."

Or a caption saying, "She likes Starbucks. And she's a bean expert."

When an officer questioned the woman, Jennifer Piranian, she reported that she was waiting to go to a local hospital.

Oh, fair enough. That would make anyone horny.

>Read the source story
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