01/02/2013

Should Scotland Stay Or Should They Go Now

With all the talk about the In/Out referendum on Europe, we get a new perspective on the Scottish one. Being faced with a decision between leaving or staying in a larger union, we can start to see how the good people of Scotland feel.

The difference is, with the Europe situation, it seems like the choices are leave or get more involved. We're in that, "I don't want to get married but I don't want to split up either. Can't we just keep things as they are?" Trust me, you never can.

Scotland has an easier question. Stay or go. But the clarity of that issues has been brought into question. The elections watchdog has said the public could be confused over how independence would affect Scotland and demanded the UK and Scottish governments provide clarity on key issues ahead of the referendum.

So just to clarify, when we say that Scotland would leave the UK, we don't mean that they will actually leave. They'll still be right there if you want to pop up for a visit. At the time of publication there are no plans to push down hard on Hadrian's Wall till it splits us in two.

If they vote to stay things won't change. We promise. We won't hold the fact that you threatened to leave against you. We won't pretend everything is fine but secretly start seeing other countries behind your back just to get revenge.

And now the details have been sorted all we need to know is what the people of Scotland answer to the question... erm, to the question...

That's the next problem. The commission rejected the SNP's preferred wording on the question to be put to voters. They wanted, "Do you agree that Scotland should be an independent country? Yes/No". That's a bit of a leading question.

They also wanted, "Do you want Scotland to be independent or would you rather French kiss a tramp?" Or their favourite, "Vote yes or the puppy gets it."

The commission warned that use of the phrase "Do you agree... potentially encouraged people to vote Yes and should be replaced by more neutral wording". It put forward its own question "Should Scotland be an Independent country? Yes/No".

If they really want neutral language they should get the people of England and Wales to vote for the question. They'd come up with the very neutral, "Erm, whatevs."

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