16/09/2014

Who's The Most Hated Passenger

There's a new study into the kind of people we hate to travel on planes with. I've only just arrived in Estonia after flying here yesterday, so I read this news while worrying that I was going to get a personal mention.

The second most hated passenger is the smelly one. I'm assuming that's not me. In fact it can't be me. You can't take more that 100ml of fluids with you onto a plane and I certainly ain't throwing away any toiletries so I just use them all before I get to departures. When I fly I smell gooooood.

There was a man on the flight yesterday who kept farting in front of me. He was sat in front of me, it wasn't like it was my go and he butted in. But you can't blame him for that because the air pressure. The same effect that makes your eardrums feel weird happens on your bumhole. And you wouldn't want to see someone do the bum version of holding your nose and blowing.

As I say, the smelly flyer is number two in the list, the most hated passenger is the seat recliner. You're saying most people would rather have someone's smell in their face than their chair. If someone reclines their chair you can get the space back by reclining yours. I suppose if someone lets rip on a flight you can make it better by mixing in your own brand too, but I still don't think it's the same.

Also in the survey parents who let their children run riot came in third.

They should be bumped up the list because they're also the nightmare at the baggage drop off with their 5 bags that they didn't bother to weigh so they have to repack while the rest of the world waits behind them. And taking kids on flights isn't fair because of the ear pain. Not theirs because of the pressure difference round the eardrum, ours from having to listen to them crying.

In fourth place it's the people who use your armrest.

So, tired stand-ups who spend most of the flight snoring didn't make the list. Excellent. I'm glad I didn't get a mention.

>Read the source story
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