Just in case the starving masses of the planet haven't had a bad enough day we let them hear about how we in the West hold contests to see who can eat way more than they need in the quickest time.
The latest is that Joey "Jaws" Chestnut earned his eighth consecutive world title in New York by having 61 hotdogs. A good day for Joey, but a bad day for the pigs.
Before I get too carried away we should remember that last year Mr Chestnut managed 69 in the same time. What the hell happened, Joey? You picked a bad time to start a diet.
He was probably just nervous because after winning the event this year he proposed to his girlfriend. Now that is a stroke of genius. Most men stage something romantic before they propose, setting the bar way higher than they'll ever be able to match for the rest of that relationship. But Joey popped the question after she had seen him sitting down stuffing his face. If she wants to marry you after seeing that she really is a keeper.
Joey got down on one knee before live television and a crowd of some 30,000 spectators and proposed to his girlfriend Neslie Ricasa. And they crowd were impressed, mainly that someone who eats that much can get down on one knee and then back up again without the aid of a crane or a TV crew from Channel 5 filming it.
His wife-to-be is also a competitive eater. So if you're invited to the wedding and there's a buffet at the reception, best queue for it early.
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