Good news: You can now buy pants that smell like bacon. Thank god. It means I don't have to spend time making my own. Something, something, something... banned from Tescos.
A company has started producing the bacon scented undercrackers, although I'm not really sure why. If you have pants that smell of bacon it's not likely to make me think, “Yum,” it's more likely to make me think, “You need to wash your damn pants!”
In fact, maybe that's the main reason behind these. Telling the meat-eaters about the terrible conditions that animals are kept in hasn't made many people stop eating meat, but make the smell of bacon synonymous with gussets and you may turn a few. Stomachs.
It won't improve your lovelife, I'm sure. No one wants to wants to sniff bacon when they're going down there, Kermit notwithstanding.
The problem of meeting someone with a dog and trying to hold a chat while their dog is snout-deep in your crotch will only get worse.
Any security guard will a good sense of smell will think you're a shoplifter.
But, should you want to buy them, they do them for men and women and it's a company called J&D's. Get them, and you could be the first person to have your pants smelling like bacon since David Cameron went to university.
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