Altercates On A Train

There's an unusual story about a train journey in the news. If you live in the area served by Southern Trains you'll think the strange element to this is that the train was actually running and the drivers weren't on strike. But that's not it.

On a train from Paddington to Exeter a first class passenger (he was a passenger in the first class section, I'm not passing judgement on him as a man), Dr Peter Ellis got annoyed when a fellow passenger from the lower classes kept popping into the first class bit to nick nibbles.

On the fifth food dash made by this Leslie Gilmer the Doc had a word. Leslie left the first class section, then came back and crammed a £10 note into Peter's mouth. I'm not sure where he'd be expecting the change to drop out.

This is the problem with the new plastic £10 note, you could cram it into someone's mouth and, if you're willing to wait and ideally own some gloves, you could get it back a day later. There's no loss for the thug.

Dr Ellis said, "I felt an object being pushed into my mouth." There's never a good start to a story.

He said Gilmer slurred, "Eat this you c***!" That's how the wrote it in the newspaper. Could be "chap".

Again, that's not a nice way to deliver. If someone says, "Eat this you c***!" it's only good if you're in a restaurant in the East End.

Gilmer was found guilty and had to pay £1,740, which for some food on a train, is about the usual price.