30/11/2016

SomeNews v3.0 - ep4 - Smoking, Trump and Loud Eaters

SomeNews podcast

It's the new SomeNews Podcast.

In the all new v3.0 of the SomeNews podcast Steve N Allen and Erich McElroy chat through the news and bring you a handy digest of the latest. This time it's Donald Trump and Farage again, annoying thing your co-workers do, no smoking signs and more.





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28/11/2016

Ed Balls, Adele and Exes [Podcast]

It was another cover show and we got round to talking about Ed Balls, Honey G, things you'd say to your ex (shame we didn't have Little Mix in the studio to answer that one) and Larry told us about Little Mix's money problems (so it's a good thing we didn't have Little Mix in the studio).

Here's the podcast of it for you to download/listen. (Originally broadcast on Monday 28th of November 2016.)




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Get the info on how to listen to the show live here.

To find more radio show minipodcasts see here.
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And if you enjoyed that check out the SomeNews Topical Podcast.



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26/11/2016

[Newspaper Column] Post-Truth

Each week the Romford Recorder has the Steve Allen column. And now you can find it in the Ilford Recorder too. If you're around East London and West Essex you can buy the newspaper every Thursday/Friday, or follow @mrstevenallen to see the columns on Twitter. You can also read the archive of past ones, which can be found here.


You can click the image to zoom in on the paper, or read the column below.


They keep adding new words to the dictionary. I'm not sure why, I haven't used all of the old ones, although I try to get them into conversation, which is very argute of me. (I'm still in the As, so I have a lot to go.)

The word of the year from the Collins dictionary is "binge-watch", which means "to watch a large number of television programmes in succession" and isn't the job someone should have to stop me buying chocolate after a bad stand-up gig.

Meanwhile the Oxford English dictionary, the MumsNet to Collins' NetMums, says the word of the year is "post-truth". What a lovely way of saying utter lies.

They say we live in this post-truth world where things don't have to be true. It's claimed fake news stories on social media may have affected the outcome of the US election. That's the irony, in this post-truth world people don't post truth on their Facebook.

Or course we lie on social media. I had an ex who'd force us to take smiling selfies even during rows because she wanted her friends to think everything was perfect in her life.

Facebook was where people shared the story that the Pope endorsed Donald Trump. He didn't. But post-truth there's no point being upset so I made a press release saying the Pope always listens when I'm on the radio. I do a show on Sunday mornings so it's not believable but it's not about trust, it's about how it makes you feel.

Realising that no one cares about facts, no one wants to hear from experts if Michael Gove is right (but what would he know, he's an expert) and people care how something "feels" makes me want to give up and binge-watch a boxset instead. How very argute.

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23/11/2016

SomeNews v3.0 - ep3 - Trump, Tesco and Truth

SomeNews podcast

It's the new SomeNews Podcast.

In the all new v3.0 of the SomeNews podcast Steve N Allen and Erich McElroy chat through the news and bring you a handy digest of the latest. This time it's Donald Trump and Farage, the post-truth world, people who didn't vote and Tesco who all getting dealt with.





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Are Tesco Elitist?

Many would say the problem in this country has been the inequality between the elite and the rest of us. We had Cameron and Osborne running this country and it took a Brexit to get rid of the elite and replace them with a woman who went to Oxford.

But you expect the top levels of this nation to be a place that discriminated against we plebs. You don't expect it from Tesco. A branch of the supermarket made state school children queue while private pupils walked straight in.

Thanks for the metaphor Tesco. It's better that those kids get used to it now.

Professor Neil Pollock - and when your working-class representative is a professor you know you're doing well - tweeted that his son and the other pupils from the state school he went to were forced to queue and only allowed into the shop in small groups.

Meanwhile the nobs from George Watson’s College were allowed straight in without queuing.

Tesco tweeted back saying the "private school normally have a lesser amount of children which is quicker and easier for the store".

Hmm, I'm not sure saying, "there are fewer of that group" is an argument against it being elitist.

"There's only a handful of people went to Oxford university so it's OK if they want to face-screw a pig."

It's a difficult story to be angry about as, in general, anything that keeps children out of a shop is a good thing. It means I can go about my shopping business without fear of hearing, "Oh my days, dat tall bloke is like well bald," but letting some in and not others is unfair.

And while I think the advantages given to the posh are the things blocking social mobility in this country, easy access to a Tesco isn't the definition of privilege. I read about this story while queuing to pay in an M&S.

I didn't think that posh people went to Tesco and that goes to show how outdated my thinking is. Post-credit crunch the rich people can't afford the lifestyle they were used to, and now going to Tesco is the closest they get to owning a horse.

>Read the source story
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21/11/2016

Steve's Norway Adventure

When I'm not doing the radio stuff I can be found gigging all over the place. If you'd like to see me doing stand-up comedy there's a diary of some of the gigs I'm doing on the mrstevenallen website. If you spot a gig near you drop me a line and I'll give you all the details.

Recently I took the act to Norway. I learned a lot. They don't have the blight of PPI texts over there and they also don't have the chap in the toilets who does that "splash for gash" thing. It's a much better way of life.

In the venue I performed in they had unisex toilets. Or I took a wee in the ladies. I don't really know.

While I was out there I recorded a little feature on my time away. Here it is to listen to...

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20/11/2016

Recap The Week - 20/11/16

Well, what a week it's been. Here is a random collection of things that happened. Or maybe they didn't. This week we heard that the phrase that defines modern news is "post-truth". That's the best euphemism for bull***t I've heard. I'm no longer lying in my CV it's post-truth, which means I'm all very modern and trendy.

Facebook has started to look into how they can filter out the news stories that are fake, giving us the biggest irony of this story, the thing that people don't do now is actually post truth.

There's a worry that fake news on social media may have caused the outcome in the US election. The Donald met with our own Nigel Farage, pictured here…


...they can't even play rock-paper-scissors correctly. The world is doomed.

On a lighter note, I'm A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here is back on the TV. It's easy to mock them but it can't be easy, that Australian jungle is filled with annoying little critters...


And in sports news this happened...


...a lesser person would've said something about "drugs and hookers" but not me.

I was busy doing the weekly topical comedy show on BBC Kent, and you can listen back to it on the iPlayer for the next month. And you can read this week's newspaper column I do in the local papers.

And now, let's do the next week.




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[Newspaper Column] Polls

Each week the Romford Recorder has the Steve Allen column. And now you can find it in the Ilford Recorder too. If you're around East London and West Essex you can buy the newspaper every Thursday/Friday, or follow @mrstevenallen to see the columns on Twitter. You can also read the archive of past ones, which can be found here.





You can click the image to zoom in on the paper, or read the column below.


I've finally worked out what I want to be when I grow up. I realise I may have left it too late now that even my showbiz age is too old to make it in showbiz but I've noticed a job I think I'd be perfect for.

In recent times we have seen the pollsters get it spectacularly wrong. The polls said David Cameron wouldn't get an outright majority in parliament. The polls said the remain campaign would be victorious in the EU referendum. The polls predicted Hilary Clinton would be the president of the United States. Every single time the polls have got it totally wrong and that feels like something I'd be good at.

In your job, if you got things so wrong on so many occasions you'd probably be fired but the pollsters carry on ready to get it wrong again next time.

In retrospect, of course polls are wrong. If you don't have the wherewithal to avoid a man in the high street with a clipboard and branded lanyard then you are probably more dimwitted than the rest of the population, and these are the people the surveys are based on.

I regret ever paying attention to a poll. All those years wasted listening to Bruno Brookes. For all I know he was making it up. Next they'll probably say Family Fortunes was just entertainment and not serious sociological research.

Asking a few people and then extrapolating the data clearly doesn't work. That's the method used to measure radio listening figures. And if the polls about the Tory government, Brexit and the US election have taught us anything it's that the smallest group in the polls is probably the biggest group in reality.

And that is really good news for my show.
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19/11/2016

When Barack Met Alex

In a world of disturbed politics, MRSA and computer hacks it's nice to find a news story that doesn't make you think we're all going to die by this time next week.

In America, Barack Obama – who must be so relaxed at work now, bringing in toys like the last day of school – met a six-year-old boy who wrote letter offering his home to Syrian refugee.

It's so nice that the raw thoughts of a child are to help others, before the weight of life batters that person into being selfish and scared like everyone else.

Little Alex wrote to the president saying that he'd offer his house to a refugee. It's unclear at this stage of the six-year-old owns the house or has the right to make such and offer, but it's a nice thought.

The irony is, when Barack and Alex met, only one of them was actually about to move out and let someone else move in.
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Naughty List And More [Podcast]

I covered two days of a breakfast show and turned it into a podcast. We talked about naughty lists, the Cyrus family, I'm A Celeb and lots more.

Here's the podcast of it for you to download/listen. (Originally broadcast on Wednesday 16th and Thursday 17th of November 2016.)




Download the mp3.

     | Subscribe with iTunes | Subscribe via RSS feed | | |

Get the info on how to listen to the show live here.

To find more radio show minipodcasts see here.
All past episodes can be found in the radio podcast archive.
And if you enjoyed that check out the SomeNews Topical Podcast.



Share:

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