Fanny On Your Irn Bru?

If there's one thing that advertising teaches us it's that sex sells. That's why with every copy of my comedy album I'm offering a free picture of my junk. I've had quite a lot of interest. Mainly from the police. But even though sex sells I'm not sure doing what Irn Bru have done is the best move. They've made thousands of bottles with "Fanny" on them. Is it their new Fatty Arbuckle range?

You look at the bottles with Fanny written in large letters and you think, "That's a brave new flavour." Although, just like Coke, it could have a Cherry version.

It turns out it's the Irn Bru version of the Coca Cola campaign to put people's names on the bottles. The Coke one has been a great success. I have seen people in shops searching through the bottles to find their names. Having your name on your drink is currently cool and trendy. And yet having my name in my pants apparently makes me a loser.

The Coke one has an advert where someone called Fredrick III has his name on a bottle. They put that on one but I couldn't find a Steve. Although I found one that said Stephanie so I drank that. I have to be honest, I liked it. It was more comfortable than a man's one. I felt pretty.

Irn Bru have done their version with Scottish names and that's why they have some bottles that say Fanny. I didn't realise Fanny was Scottish. I was up there performing a show last year and I didn't hear anyone shout Fanny. They shouted something related to that at me. Everyone's a critic.

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