29/08/2012

Women Get Ready Longer In Liverpool

While one part of science is busy exploring Mars another branch has some new research for us. According to the latest study, women from Liverpool spend the longest getting ready to go out. This is good information. If you are an impatient man, or a really old man, you know not to date a Liverpool woman. Thanks research!

I don’t think the fact that Liverpool women beat those in Essex really tells us much, but the times involved do. They spend more than 3 hours on average getting dolled up before going out.

If I’d spent 3 hours getting ready I’d want to look like a different person. I’d want a prosthetic face I could pull off later like in Mission Impossible.

The irony is that they spend hours getting dressed and at the end of it they’re not even wearing that many clothes. It can’t take that long to tie some string round your bits.

A typical night-out regime can include anything from applying fake tan, blow-drying and styling hair to exfoliating, moisturising and polishing the skin. Polishing skin? Is that to stop the dust settling.

When you think of all that you do to get ready it’s basically fakery. Fake tan, false nails, false eyelashes, padded bra, dyed hair, drawn on eyebrows and control pants. It’s all lies. There’s even a product called “concealer”. After after you put all that on you go out and try to find someone who loves you for being you.

>Read the source story

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