20/04/2012

Olympic Flame's Thames Trip Cancelled

Plans to carry the Olympic flame down the Thames on a replica of an ancient Greek warship have been scuppered by Games bosses on health and safety grounds.

To be fair we should be grateful the health and safety people haven't had a freak out about the flame. I half expected our flame bearers to carry a torch with an orange bit of cloth blown by a fan in the base.

The 70-ton wooden trireme was to be rowed from Tower Bridge to Stratford on July 27th. No wonder health and safety had a problem. If you row something down the Thames these days some idiot will go for a swim in front of you as a protest.

The official line from officials is that the plans have been scrapped as it might be "too attractive" to visitors. A leaked email from Locog said: "Clearly a vessel such as the trireme has the greatest potential to draw large crowds and it is a risk as are just not able to take at the time."

If you don't want large crowds of people don't hold an Olympics. They tend to make people gather. It's a war ship, designed to kill people, and the health and safety worry is about overcrowding.

But I like the fact that something doesn't get the go ahead because it is "too attractive". Finally, I know why my career isn't going that well.

>Read the source story
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