Lack Of Exercise Is The New Smoking

New research says we Britons are some of the worst in the world for failing to be active. I learned this news while watching TV, so I am in no place to judge.

The new report says that 17% of all UK deaths are caused by a lack of exercise. That seems really high. Unless you're blaming the pedestrians for not running out of the way of the oncoming cars in traffic accidents.

The figures show that not exercising enough can be as deadly as smoking. Don't say that. You know what this country got like with its hatred of smokers. If the same happens with fat people we'll be awash in more rules and regulations.

If not exercising is the new smoking they'll start to make us not exercise outside. While all the fit thin people who can stand all night in pubs are let in, we chubbers will be made to sit on the sofas out the back.

They'll make announcements on flights that "this is a no obesity plane". Although that makes sense. If they charge for extra baggage with cases why not extra baggage on the people? And the announcement that "customers are reminded that it is illegal to be fat in the toilets" won't be needed. Anything more than emaciated and you can't fit in the things.

We have health warnings on cigarette packs that show us diseased lungs. So we'd get warnings before TV shows. Forget the Coronation Street sponsor adverts, we'll get the message, "Sitting On Your Ass Can Kill!" along with a picture of some salad dodger's bum.

Just over 63% of Brits fail to meet recommended levels of physical activity, but in America it's only 41%. We are lazier than America! And they have guns. Over here we have to chase after people if we want to hit them.

I've taken heed of this warning and recently I have been going to the gym to work on my core. And now, when I see the women in that gym working up a sweat in their tight lycra, I can say "core!" just like Sid James in a Carry On film.

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