The Duke of York was branded a liar in the papers today.
He didn't have 10,000 men. He barely had 8,000. It was all just bullsh... oh, not that one. Prince Andrew was the one they meant.
The newspaper said: "As pressure mounts on the UK trade envoy over links with paedophile billionaire..."
Now, I know they mean Jeffrey Epstein but every time I read the phrase 'paedophile billionaire' I think they mean Daddy Warbucks.
Apparently the Prince misled the world on his ex-wife's cash-for-access scandal. Andrew denied knowing a key Miss Fixit in Fergie's bid to clinch £500000, but that wasn't exactly true.
Although, if I were Andrew I'd be lying through my teeth to make out that I didn't even know Fergie. "But you were married to her?" "No, you must be thinking of a different Prince Andrew."
But before we all attack Prince Andrew, let's remember what got Fergie in trouble in the first place. She was getting money in return for giving someone access to Andrew. There's a recession on and I think this is a great way to bring much needed fund in. People people to pay for being able to speak to Prince Andrew. Basically, get him a job on Babestation.