15/05/2012

No Euro Double-Dip

The Eurozone has escaped a double-dip. This is shocking. How come they're not in recession but we are? Add to that the fact that a dog is the most talented person in the UK right now, and this is a bad time to be a Brit.

New figures showed that GDP across the 17-member states was flat between January and March; the period that saw the UK having a 0.2% drop. And Chancellor George Osborne has blamed our weak economy on the chaos in the Eurozone.

So, Europe is so bad it causes our double-dip, but didn't cause itself a double dip. Or Osborne was just blaming the foreigners. I wonder which is more likely.

What could we have done differently to avoid the double-dip? Well, it was our fault for coming out of recession in the first place. If you stay in recession it's only ever one long dip. This could be why I am not an official Government adviser.

The only good news from this story is when the newspaper said: "France escaped a double-dip with flat growth."

"Flat growth"? I like that as a phrase. "No, dear. I don't have a small willy, it's just undergone flat growth." Although, to be fair, in that scenario, a double-dip sound more fun.

>Read the source story
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