The disaster we're looking at is about money. David Cameron said the world is "staring down the barrel" of a new economic catastrophe.
A new one? I thought we were still in the old one. That's exactly what's wrong with society, we start a new one before we're done with the old. That's what got us in this mess in the first place.
Here's what happened to make it one of the worst days in the world economy:
New figures suggested the 17 eurozone nations are already back in recession.
Really? If Greece's economy shrinks any more it'll be able to run its affairs in a Barklay's business account.
The head of the International Monetary Fund warned the world was entering a 'dangerous place'.
What? Hackney?
Fears grew that France's banking sector will need to be bailed out.
Oh no. I like France's banks, but only because I have find memories of saying, "bonk!" in lessons.
And Greece looked unlikely to deliver fresh spending cuts, risking a catastrophic debt default.
I think they need to call Ocean Finance.
Panic-selling rocked global stock markets and UK companies lost £64billion of their value in the FTSE 100's worst day since the height of the crisis in spring 2009.
And that's the only positive we can take out of this. I don't know what kind of a day you had yesterday. Maybe it wasn't a great one. Perhaps you didn't hit deadlines, you sent the wrong file, you got in trouble with the boss. Maybe you totally messed up. But no matter how bad your day was.... you didn't lose £64billion! In comparison, you're doing pretty well.
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