What? Two fighters, who made a career out of hitting people, work out all the time and are probably more full of testosterone than the average bollock, these fighters... got into a fight! Hold the front page!
Oh, that's right, no need to, because this story actually got onto the front page.
Here's what happened. Chisora lost a heavyweight title bout to Ukrainian Vitali Klitschko. After there was a press conference where he and Haye got into it. As it said in the paper: "Former champion Haye first traded insults with Chisora at a press conference. But minutes later their goading had turned into a chaotic and bloody free-for-all."
Another surprise. They war of words didn't last long. I'd assume that's due to a lack of ammunition.
During a press conference, Chisora said Haye was "an embarrassment" in front of the media, adding "How's your toe?". He said that because Haye's defeat at the hands of younger Klitschko brother Wladimir last year was blamed on injured toe.
Breaking a toe is a serious thing for a boxer. It stops them counting to twenty for a start.
Haye then called Chisora a "loser". To which Chisora shouted, "tell that to my face", not understanding that his face was already in the room, so that's what Haye had just done.
Chisora then waded into the crowd and the pair went head to head. An ugly scrap broke out in which Haye appeared to swing his right hand, which was holding a bottle. It was a bottle of orange juice though. Legal experts say Haye could get some prison time for fighting with a dangerous weapon.
Was it even glass, or is it considered dangerous because it might be Sunny Delight?
Film footage appears to show Chisora emerging from the melee brandishing a glass bottle, and he said he was going to "physically shoot David Haye". So, he's not an expert in using a bottle, but he's getting there.
And the latest twist is that David Haye is now on the run from German police. Police quizzed Chisora but it looks like Haye has already headed back to the UK. Last night the British Boxing Board of Control was set to launch an investigation into the incident.
Good, they need to sort this out. As many have been saying, this act of violence has besmirched the good reputation of beating people up for a living.
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