Review of 2012 - July

In July, Justin Bieber caused a frenzy on Twitter when he announced his first UK tour for two years. I don't know why all the girls fancy him. The woman in America who claimed Bieber was the father of her child said he got her pregnant in a 30-second romp. 30 seconds. No wonder they call him Justin.

Andy Murray was knocked out of Wimbledon (let me double check I'm reading my notes for 2012, because that could be any year). I watched the live coverage. The showed us all the famous people who were watching. David Cameron was there, disapproving of the returns. Just like when he heard about Jimmy Carr's tax. And the camera showed us Pippa Middleton, proving that there was one very lucky seat in Wimbledon that day. I enjoyed watching it. I don't like that umpire though. Always picking faults.

Life changed forever when they discovered the Higgs Boson, the particle that gives us mass. So it's Higg's fault I'm fat. Not the all the cake. I knew it. Discovering the thing that gives us mass is like when Wile E. Coyote looks down to see he's not stood on a cliff. We all weigh more now.

Chelsea's John Terry was found not guilty of racially abusing Queens Park Rangers' Anton Ferdinand. Turns out Terry's lawyer is a better defender than he is. But the world of sport was more excited about the London Olympics. The run up to the games was all about the worry about gridlocked traffic, G4S messing up the security, the threat of industrial action and empty seats. If moaning about the Olympics was an Olympic sport, we would've got gold.

Get ready for the SomeNews Podcast "2012 Review", out on December 31st. Subscribe now for free via iTunes/RSS/email and get it as soon as it's released.

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