31/12/2012

Review of 2012 - December

Ah, December. It's like it was only yesterday.

Back in September we saw Kate Middleton topless on a balcony. In December we found out the second part of that story. They'd had sex. I think that's how it works. We heard Kate was pregnant with a Royal baby. And given what we saw back in September, we knew where that baby would be dining. Get ready for austerity Britain baby.

701145486After Starbucks, Google and Amazon got into trouble for not paying much corporation tax in the UK, Starbucks said they'd pay a bit. How very nice of them. They seemed to think tax was like paying a tip, and that HMRC was just a big version of a pot on the counter.

But the Twittersphere when crazy and people were tweeting things like, "I'm going to boycott Starbucks for not paying tax." Which they tweeted from the Google Chrome browser, or Amazon Kindle Fire, or Google Android phone that they bought on Amazon. Basically, we're screwed.

James Arthur won this year's X Factor, which meant Jahmene Douglas came second. Or as Nicole would say, Jahunfortunate. And Christopher Maloney came third. He could've won it if he hadn't have run out of phone credit.

Good news. December saw the biggest fall in jobless numbers for a decade. See, if you stop giving people on benefits enough money to eat, the numbers soon drop. Well 701116160done Government. With more people earning money it explains why more people can afford to waste their cash by throwing it at Rio Ferdinand. And while we're talking stats, data from the census shows that people who are 'White British' are now a minority in London. They're also a minority in Essex. Well, they don't look white there.

And more stats. Scientists predicted a crisis in low sperm counts in men (obviously in men. If a woman has a high sperm count she's either got medical problems or is very popular at her work's Xmas do). The Independent even ran a special feature called "How to boost your sperm count". Spoiler alert: Reducing it like a jus doesn't work.

Oh, and the Mayans predicted that we'd all die in December 2012. I guess they got it wrong. Oh well, it's not the end of the world.


Get ready for the SomeNews Podcast "2012 Review", out on December 31st. Subscribe now for free via iTunes/RSS/email and get it as soon as it's released.

See also:
January|February|March|April|May|June|July|
August|September|October|November|December
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